I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
