Swine flu. Run for my life!
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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