your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
