and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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