wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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