He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
