I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
