Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
why do cheetos always look like penises
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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