She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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