It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
