Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
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