the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
