i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
