I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
