Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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