No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
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