Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
