if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
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