you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
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