we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
Everything about him screamed your future.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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