They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
