i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
