I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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