I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize