honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
