Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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