Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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