I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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