yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
He better not be in your backpack
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
