Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
