i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
