I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Vodka?
Forever.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
