Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
The uberlube is also flammable
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
