Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
