You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
