No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
