We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
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