dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize