Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize