what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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