all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
