He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
