i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
There r osticjed everywhere
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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