You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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