he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Randomize
