so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
