I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
i've created a new STD.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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