good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
