your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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