Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
It's official drugs can't kill me
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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